Well it’s that time of the year again; yes the end of a year and the beginning of another. It sounds like a bit of a cliché. I know we get to this point every year, if we are fortunate enough that is to live through one year and see the start to another. It’s a good time to reflect on the past, and look forward with renewed hope.
A lot has happened this year but many people will probably say that. But for me personally it has been yet again another rollercoaster ride of a year and some of the highlights of this year I write about here briefly.
One of my main highlights has to be hitting 30 in May. I dreaded this point in my life and well before the big birthday; months before, even years before it, I recall saying I would hibernate before it and after it, in the hope that it would pass without anyone noticing that I had turned 30, but mostly without me realising it. I even threatened to leave home if I wasn’t married before I turned 30 and had all the minute details of my departure planned in my head. But in fact in a turn that I never expected I found myself embracing my 30th birthday. I really looked forward to it and despite this lingering thought of marriage, I realised that I had come to a stage in my life ready to say to all the busy bodies who were taking such a keen interest in my private life to quite frankly ‘butt out’. Believe me to get to this level of confidence for me is something. Don’t get me wrong; I do want to get married and have children but with the right person when Allah wills and because I want to, not because the narrow minded busy bodies of our communities and some so called friends and families think I should. But most significantly, I had achieved far more than I had even anticipated in almost all elements of life and that was worth reaching 30 for!
Anyway in other highlights, in a remarkable way we managed to see through the end of a close friend’s battle with cancer and she came away from it a stronger person with a healthier and firmer mindset and outlook on life and as a result I became a better person and I thank the Lord that I got to experience such a critical time at such a tender age.
My brother got married and despite all the chaos surrounding it, we managed to get to the other side of the world and have a fantastic wedding. Thanks to his wedding, I got to see and travel through Australia sooner than I had anticipated and the awesomeness of this trip was totally spectacular and shall linger with me for longer than I can ever explain or imagine.
We had a fantastic family holiday in Morocco and an even better trip as a family to Canada. Just to reconnect with all the family back in Canada bought us back to our roots and in a sense where family mattered, proved that family do matter in the right context and in the right time. Finally the much desired Far East tour kicked in this year in October and plans are underway already to continue this tour over the years God Willing.
With years of toil and constant and undivided commitment to their children, I finally saw my parents off away on vacation just the two of them on two separate occasions. This was something I had always desired for them and to see an end result evokes a sense of accomplishment and reward.
I plucked up the courage to get on the property ladder and since I’m still single, this was a tough decision in itself. At a time when recession hits everyone in difficult times, I feel I am making a good decision on my part and the greatest element in this is my assurance and self-reliance continues to take a constant upward direction and I have Allah to thank for giving me the strength and my parents to thank for encouraging me and supporting me endlessly.
In other great achievements, I have begun swimming classes. It’s not so much learning to swim, of course I want to conquer that aspect but it is more about overcoming this great fear that I have deep inside me. It is this fear of not being in control generally that has always affected me and for some strange reason being deep in the water I feel myself losing control, losing strength, losing a sense of direction and this is stopping me from fulfilling an achievement to be able to swim. But I am a great believer in conquering; anything is possible and though I have a long road ahead before I can strongly swim entire lengths I shall preserve into the New Year and who knows for I may succeed sooner than I trust myself too.
I walked my first Race for Life in the summer this year and that was a remarkable feeling, for it is a cause I am deeply connected to now. This year I owned my first car after sharing one for the last 13 years of driving, for me this was liberation from my personal uncertainties and again an addition to my independence.
But it wasn’t all singing and dancing; there was some gloom. One significant event procured the entire latter part of this year, and dominated life in the most peculair of ways, and though no resolve was ever achieved, the people close, to be affected by this, and including myself remain in limbo. This, my friends is a feeling no person should ever have to endure. I learnt that no matter how much you desire something, and even going to the lengths of shifting the earth could not make something that is not meant to be. On other lows, I had a moment of reconnection to my past. Though in retrospect that was nice, the overall feeling was of sadness and maybe a hint of bitterness for when you really trust and know a person, they let you down very badly. It comes to an even better understanding that people are not what they seem to be, even those who are closest to you.
So while one issue looms over our heads as we embark in to 2010, only Allah knows what the rest of next year shall entail; what joys and miseries are to befall us? What I do know is that if I have survived this year, I can take on almost anything that shall face me in the next.
I wish you all a very happy and peaceful New Year. I pray it brings you mountains of strength to face those unfortunate difficulties that God forbid may cross your path and most importantly may the year burst with fountains of hope, happiness, peace, love and joy! :)
Aisha
Thursday, 31 December 2009
Wednesday, 30 December 2009
Festive celebrations..
Up until my trip to the Far East a couple of months back, I had not realised how ignorant people in my country are to the festive occasions of people from other creeds and religions. I am serious on this issue. The lack of understanding and respect is non-existent amongst many more people in this country than I had imagined.
When I went out to Malaysia in October, Eid celebrations had just come to an end and preparations were underway for Diwali. You talked to various people and one could never assume by looking at the person, their preferences when it came to festive celebrations. It was broadly and pleasantly acceptable that people were free to celebrate whichever celebrations they desired to and the color of your skin or any other element did not matter. If you so desired, you could celebrate them all and most of all every single person happily greeted each other and knew exactly when these celebratory days were. No one was clueless. In fact they were all clued up well on the details of various festive occasions The shopping malls were all true to the spirit of Diwali at the time, having just taken down their decor from Eid. This was the true spirit of genuine people who lived side by side accepting all faith and all festive occasions.
Most people in my country are ignorant. They can't even bring themselves to wish you well on Eid or ask if you had a good Eid. But turn the coin, and the minority are almost backed into some shitty corner to utter well wishes on Christmas, and should you make a mistake to not, my Goodness, it's almost like a crime that you should be hung, drawn and quartered for. Not so literally I suppose but it the attitude posed to you that sucks.
It doesn't bother me, I know enough about the Christian faith, the reason behind Christmas. Sadly those who supposedly celebrate it don't. They are so vain and uninteresting unless it has a materialistic approach to it. The true moral and spiritual significance to the faith and celebrations are completely lost. I find people submerged in spending hundreds and even thousands of pounds on gifts, decorations and food. There is no covetous from me as I think about this, just simple sadness to be amongst people who are so grasping and I dread to think that people of my faith would ever turn in this approach. For when we celebrate, the spiritual significance is still there, it's beautiful and its genuine, it's for a cause encompassing every possible element in life.
I do the cards, and the gifts to a degree, mostly because it's a good time to keep in touch with people you don't get to see often, to share with them a little of what you would desire for oneself. I wish well and I enjoy Christmas to an extent openly and happily. But I’d love to see a day when the majority would be as courteous to the minority when it comes to festivities!
One can only hope for change..:)
Aisha
When I went out to Malaysia in October, Eid celebrations had just come to an end and preparations were underway for Diwali. You talked to various people and one could never assume by looking at the person, their preferences when it came to festive celebrations. It was broadly and pleasantly acceptable that people were free to celebrate whichever celebrations they desired to and the color of your skin or any other element did not matter. If you so desired, you could celebrate them all and most of all every single person happily greeted each other and knew exactly when these celebratory days were. No one was clueless. In fact they were all clued up well on the details of various festive occasions The shopping malls were all true to the spirit of Diwali at the time, having just taken down their decor from Eid. This was the true spirit of genuine people who lived side by side accepting all faith and all festive occasions.
Most people in my country are ignorant. They can't even bring themselves to wish you well on Eid or ask if you had a good Eid. But turn the coin, and the minority are almost backed into some shitty corner to utter well wishes on Christmas, and should you make a mistake to not, my Goodness, it's almost like a crime that you should be hung, drawn and quartered for. Not so literally I suppose but it the attitude posed to you that sucks.
It doesn't bother me, I know enough about the Christian faith, the reason behind Christmas. Sadly those who supposedly celebrate it don't. They are so vain and uninteresting unless it has a materialistic approach to it. The true moral and spiritual significance to the faith and celebrations are completely lost. I find people submerged in spending hundreds and even thousands of pounds on gifts, decorations and food. There is no covetous from me as I think about this, just simple sadness to be amongst people who are so grasping and I dread to think that people of my faith would ever turn in this approach. For when we celebrate, the spiritual significance is still there, it's beautiful and its genuine, it's for a cause encompassing every possible element in life.
I do the cards, and the gifts to a degree, mostly because it's a good time to keep in touch with people you don't get to see often, to share with them a little of what you would desire for oneself. I wish well and I enjoy Christmas to an extent openly and happily. But I’d love to see a day when the majority would be as courteous to the minority when it comes to festivities!
One can only hope for change..:)
Aisha
What.....??
...So what is the hardest thing to unreservedly achieve in this world.....??
.....Peace I say!?!
...What do you think?
Aisha
.....Peace I say!?!
...What do you think?
Aisha
Tuesday, 29 December 2009
Childhood memories...
Childhood memories of the winter season have profoundly been relived this year with the most amazing snowfall in ages! I haven't stopped talking about snow. Everything I do, say or think is attached to snow at the moment. Seasonal changes don't generally affect me so much but on the contrary the Brits do resolve to much talk geared around the weather.
It's not often that childhood memories are evoked unless I force myself to relive it. Isn't it strange that certain things and events usually out of the blue remind you of the past? So quite strangely the snowfall this time around has reminded me nothing but years that have gone by.
In those years left behind us, every winter it snowed as it has done in the past few days. It was part of your life. You walked to school in your wellies trudging in the snow. It wasn’t toilsome. Nobody moaned and whined about the snow. You put your wooly hat on your head, wrapped your scarf around, put you mittens on, and off you went. We even had leg warmers and ear muffs. They were awesomely cute. It was the most normal way of coping with the snow, yet unique in its way.
That's how I want to handle it this time around, except I find myself surrounded by people who are just moaning, a country who cannot cope, a country that cannot use snow in a positive way at all. It's pathetic and sadly a dismal state of the spirit of this country's people, most of whom moan over every seasonal change!
One night last week after the second heavy snowfall, a lot of the kids and teenagers, all sizes were out playing in the snow until late. Watching the scene bought warmth to my heart for this is what it's all about. We would be out, making snowballs and throwing them at each other with hopeless aims. Rolling the snow and making the biggest snowman one could. Those were memories that would reemain within the heart and mind but not evoked often, in fact not in a very long time, until that night. I decided after work that day, that's exactly what we would do, go out into the garden and play in the snow. To remain young at heart you have to free yourself and live a like a child sometimes. There may be memories long gone by but they need not stop, for a collection of memories can never burst to the brim :)
Aisha
It's not often that childhood memories are evoked unless I force myself to relive it. Isn't it strange that certain things and events usually out of the blue remind you of the past? So quite strangely the snowfall this time around has reminded me nothing but years that have gone by.
In those years left behind us, every winter it snowed as it has done in the past few days. It was part of your life. You walked to school in your wellies trudging in the snow. It wasn’t toilsome. Nobody moaned and whined about the snow. You put your wooly hat on your head, wrapped your scarf around, put you mittens on, and off you went. We even had leg warmers and ear muffs. They were awesomely cute. It was the most normal way of coping with the snow, yet unique in its way.
That's how I want to handle it this time around, except I find myself surrounded by people who are just moaning, a country who cannot cope, a country that cannot use snow in a positive way at all. It's pathetic and sadly a dismal state of the spirit of this country's people, most of whom moan over every seasonal change!
One night last week after the second heavy snowfall, a lot of the kids and teenagers, all sizes were out playing in the snow until late. Watching the scene bought warmth to my heart for this is what it's all about. We would be out, making snowballs and throwing them at each other with hopeless aims. Rolling the snow and making the biggest snowman one could. Those were memories that would reemain within the heart and mind but not evoked often, in fact not in a very long time, until that night. I decided after work that day, that's exactly what we would do, go out into the garden and play in the snow. To remain young at heart you have to free yourself and live a like a child sometimes. There may be memories long gone by but they need not stop, for a collection of memories can never burst to the brim :)
Aisha
Tuesday, 22 December 2009
I did it!
Yup...I did it :)
Strange as it may seem I managed to drive to work yesterday morning with no sign of trouble at all. Thank God.
Mum and Dad left for the airport at the early hours of the morning. They looked a little vulnerable but I think it’s me being extremely overprotective. Sometimes I think it's my fault for doing as much as I can for them and really being at their side, kind of like on standby incase anything should go wrong or if they would need me. When the time comes for them to manage for themselves there is a tiny part of me thinks they will struggle and will not cope but that is just ridiculous, of course they will cope for goodness sake, for they bought me into the world, not the other way round!
It felt a tad bit odd, though they've gone away before, each time it doesn't get easier, I’ve spent that much time with them, more than my siblings, I am sure I am somehow more attached to them. I had a restless night thinking of them going away and then knowing their flight was going to get delayed. Then there were the thoughts of having to clear that snow weighing on my mind.
I felt like I was in Alaska when I got outside in the morning bound for work. I decided not to use the warm water approach and brushed the snow off my car. Having not shifted it since the start of the snow fall on Thursday, there was a thick heavy layer of snow covering my entire car, and as I brushed it away it flicked in all direction! I looked like an Eskimo finding her way round North Pole! But I absolutely enjoyed every second of it and slow was the drive to work, careful I was, but I did it...see mum, you panic for nothing!
Mum and dad were delayed at Manchester as expected and their estimated departure is later on in the evening. I am so pleased that between them they have endured this obstacle in the most profound way ever and it shows that one should never underestimate the courage and strength of another and certainly one's own parents but on the contrary mother now knows that even she has to have faith in me when it comes to handling treacherous driving conditions!
I was cold at work yestrerday, the heating was yet again switched off in some parts of the building or temperatures had been lowered to save on costs. I could barely feel my fingers, the harsh cold had penetrated straight through the bones and wrapping my hands round warm mugs of tea just did not do the trick!
But despite it all...Alhamdulilah :)
Aisha
Strange as it may seem I managed to drive to work yesterday morning with no sign of trouble at all. Thank God.
Mum and Dad left for the airport at the early hours of the morning. They looked a little vulnerable but I think it’s me being extremely overprotective. Sometimes I think it's my fault for doing as much as I can for them and really being at their side, kind of like on standby incase anything should go wrong or if they would need me. When the time comes for them to manage for themselves there is a tiny part of me thinks they will struggle and will not cope but that is just ridiculous, of course they will cope for goodness sake, for they bought me into the world, not the other way round!
It felt a tad bit odd, though they've gone away before, each time it doesn't get easier, I’ve spent that much time with them, more than my siblings, I am sure I am somehow more attached to them. I had a restless night thinking of them going away and then knowing their flight was going to get delayed. Then there were the thoughts of having to clear that snow weighing on my mind.
I felt like I was in Alaska when I got outside in the morning bound for work. I decided not to use the warm water approach and brushed the snow off my car. Having not shifted it since the start of the snow fall on Thursday, there was a thick heavy layer of snow covering my entire car, and as I brushed it away it flicked in all direction! I looked like an Eskimo finding her way round North Pole! But I absolutely enjoyed every second of it and slow was the drive to work, careful I was, but I did it...see mum, you panic for nothing!
Mum and dad were delayed at Manchester as expected and their estimated departure is later on in the evening. I am so pleased that between them they have endured this obstacle in the most profound way ever and it shows that one should never underestimate the courage and strength of another and certainly one's own parents but on the contrary mother now knows that even she has to have faith in me when it comes to handling treacherous driving conditions!
I was cold at work yestrerday, the heating was yet again switched off in some parts of the building or temperatures had been lowered to save on costs. I could barely feel my fingers, the harsh cold had penetrated straight through the bones and wrapping my hands round warm mugs of tea just did not do the trick!
But despite it all...Alhamdulilah :)
Aisha
Sorry for calling..!
I had this most strange experience at the early hours of this morning. I don't dream often, in fact between each dream that much time lapses, I forget when they occur. But what I do remember are the contents of the dream. It's only because when I do have a dream, I am totally excited, like a child at Christmas opening a mountain of presents. Really, a dream is so significant to me and I often wonder why, when I do have a dream, it is of specific events or specific people.
I woke up this morning in a semi subconscious state, but aware that I had been in a dream. I often dream about events pertaining to me only and occasionally it may involve my parents or siblings but very rarely other people. So this morning this dream was strange, the events in it were odd and in no way reflected the relationship that I share with the person in the dream. In fact the relationship almost ended with animosity, any chance of reconciliation was near impossible, so the experience in this dream was in a bizarre way contrary to how things were left previously. In any case, in this semi subconscious state, I retrieved my cell phone from the bed-side and dialed a number, it must have rung because it was the ringing tone that finally clicked into by that point my conscious state and I realised what I was doing. Quickly and frantically I hung up, completely annoyed with myself.
I bolted upright and looked at the screen on the phone. It had rung for a minute, but the call hadn't been answered. By this point I am not sure what I was more annoyed over, the recognition that in an uncontrollable state I had dialed the number or the fact that it hadn't been answered?! I almost expected the phone to ring with a return call but it never did, even after sometime. I think that made me ever more irritated. But what's worse is that there was no ulterior motive, this was an event with no elements of it under my full control but I doubt others would share the same opinion.
I am glad I had this dream but I am sorry that I made the call after and I know that this is undoubtedly one of those moments going beyond human comprehension but maybe just maybe you understand why it happened?!
Aisha
I woke up this morning in a semi subconscious state, but aware that I had been in a dream. I often dream about events pertaining to me only and occasionally it may involve my parents or siblings but very rarely other people. So this morning this dream was strange, the events in it were odd and in no way reflected the relationship that I share with the person in the dream. In fact the relationship almost ended with animosity, any chance of reconciliation was near impossible, so the experience in this dream was in a bizarre way contrary to how things were left previously. In any case, in this semi subconscious state, I retrieved my cell phone from the bed-side and dialed a number, it must have rung because it was the ringing tone that finally clicked into by that point my conscious state and I realised what I was doing. Quickly and frantically I hung up, completely annoyed with myself.
I bolted upright and looked at the screen on the phone. It had rung for a minute, but the call hadn't been answered. By this point I am not sure what I was more annoyed over, the recognition that in an uncontrollable state I had dialed the number or the fact that it hadn't been answered?! I almost expected the phone to ring with a return call but it never did, even after sometime. I think that made me ever more irritated. But what's worse is that there was no ulterior motive, this was an event with no elements of it under my full control but I doubt others would share the same opinion.
I am glad I had this dream but I am sorry that I made the call after and I know that this is undoubtedly one of those moments going beyond human comprehension but maybe just maybe you understand why it happened?!
Aisha
Friday, 18 December 2009
Winter at last...
So yes, we saw the beginning of snowfall yesterday afternoon and it carried through the evening and bless the flakes, they were still making their mark this morning. I don't mind winter, as long as we are geared up for it, not just us in person but in general as a country. Take for example when we had all that snowfall early this year in January bearing in mind last December we had no snow at all. So when it descended in January, all hell let loose, there weren't enough gritters out on the road and even more so not enough grit. The country was totally unprepared and it let everyone down quite badly. Schools shut for the duration and life kind of stopped at least for some. But this winter, the snow has come early, at least according to previous record but I would like to say it's on time or a little late to be honest, but that's me with my natural instinct thinking seasonal changes should occur exactly when they should!
Anyway, this morning the roads were remarkably clear though the streets looked a tad dangerous since no gritters had been out and of course they have stopped leaving grit pits at certain points on the street, like they use to when we were kids. But in fairness the roads had been gritted for today and were completely easy to drive through. Whether they would be generous enough to grit on any further snowfall would be another matter...Time would tell! Anyway I didn't want to risk or rather mother insisted that I shouldn't drive to work, her over-protective side kicking in yet again. So dad drove me to work and we laughed about how I couldn't rely on him like this for there would come a day where I would have to drive out in the snow, in fact it may be sooner rather than later, I said to him 'you won't fancy coming all the way from Agadir on Monday just to drive me to work if the snow stays like this'? He laughed and retorted, 'we might not even get out there if the weather conditions are too bad!' I hope they do all the same, since, they sure deserve a break.
I'm glad it snowed, I love watching it fall, it’s therapeutic and it sure is picturesque when it's falling and when it’s rested. I have to admit, the snow is at its best when it’s first fallen; fresh and crisp. Once it gets trampled over and messy it's really isn’t all that fun! The murky slushy snow looks terrible and should temperatures fall, the darn stuff turns to treacherous ice.
On the contrary, for the moment I want to enjoy watching those snowflakes just falling down and as carelessly as they may seem to fall, I know they twirl from the sky, following a set direction, some touching my face and eventually settling on the ground. I love the winter for it is how I am habituated. I would like to think I could carry on embracing the winter but seeing mum and dad struggling to cope with it, I dread the very same changes as years go by. For now though, I will enjoy the feel of the harsh cold against my skin, how it seeps through me and sends a chill, and when it gets too much, I can always be indoors and huddle near the fire telling tales of far and beyond :)
Aisha
Anyway, this morning the roads were remarkably clear though the streets looked a tad dangerous since no gritters had been out and of course they have stopped leaving grit pits at certain points on the street, like they use to when we were kids. But in fairness the roads had been gritted for today and were completely easy to drive through. Whether they would be generous enough to grit on any further snowfall would be another matter...Time would tell! Anyway I didn't want to risk or rather mother insisted that I shouldn't drive to work, her over-protective side kicking in yet again. So dad drove me to work and we laughed about how I couldn't rely on him like this for there would come a day where I would have to drive out in the snow, in fact it may be sooner rather than later, I said to him 'you won't fancy coming all the way from Agadir on Monday just to drive me to work if the snow stays like this'? He laughed and retorted, 'we might not even get out there if the weather conditions are too bad!' I hope they do all the same, since, they sure deserve a break.
I'm glad it snowed, I love watching it fall, it’s therapeutic and it sure is picturesque when it's falling and when it’s rested. I have to admit, the snow is at its best when it’s first fallen; fresh and crisp. Once it gets trampled over and messy it's really isn’t all that fun! The murky slushy snow looks terrible and should temperatures fall, the darn stuff turns to treacherous ice.
On the contrary, for the moment I want to enjoy watching those snowflakes just falling down and as carelessly as they may seem to fall, I know they twirl from the sky, following a set direction, some touching my face and eventually settling on the ground. I love the winter for it is how I am habituated. I would like to think I could carry on embracing the winter but seeing mum and dad struggling to cope with it, I dread the very same changes as years go by. For now though, I will enjoy the feel of the harsh cold against my skin, how it seeps through me and sends a chill, and when it gets too much, I can always be indoors and huddle near the fire telling tales of far and beyond :)
Aisha
Thursday, 17 December 2009
First snowfall..
Not much, but its fresh, its crisp..just lovely :)
..and there is such a chill in the air!
Aisha
Monday, 14 December 2009
Soreen
You wonder why I'm going on about Soreen?! Soreen is my 'take a break' food. Yeh I know some may prefer the Kit Kat or Mars Bar, I do too, but the calories in those chocolate bars just rest on my hips taking its place forever a bit like a cat that lands on your doorstep, you give it some milk and the darn thing never goes. That's how I view chocolate, you feed your system with it, just for the reason of 'having a break' and it's a slippery slope. So when I have chocolate, it's because of a special occasion, treat or just out of the blue I fancy it, that way I have a firm grip on it.
Anyway back to the Soreen. Not sure, if any of you have ever tried it but I kinda love the stuff. Well at least I do until I get sick of eating it all week! I'm a bit like that, I can't eat the same stuff for more than a few times in a row, then I need a change. I guess a lot of my life is a bit like that. I like variation, same monotonous crap kinda makes you a tad suicidal.
Well, I eat my Soreen, sliced and buttered. A bit like eating a fruit cake, excpet it's malty and a lot less in the calorie department unless you decide to be a bit heavy handed with the butter, then I guess it's a different matter. I've always bought Soreen loaf and often wondered if they 'Soreen' had any other products on the market and lone behold, I found out they do a cereal bar! A 95% fat-free cereal bar with 143 calories, can you believe it?.. one packed with raisins, rice, malt, oats and wheat. Just the kind of energy boost you need on a mid-morning break. Now I sure am excited, though I 'm pretty sure my supermarket is not shelving the product, so my quest is to locate a supermarket that does and then maybe, convince my local supermarket to add a new product to their cereal bar line...well 'if you don't ask you don't get', that what mother always taught me!
To a healthy and happy break of Soreen..! :)
Aisha
Anyway back to the Soreen. Not sure, if any of you have ever tried it but I kinda love the stuff. Well at least I do until I get sick of eating it all week! I'm a bit like that, I can't eat the same stuff for more than a few times in a row, then I need a change. I guess a lot of my life is a bit like that. I like variation, same monotonous crap kinda makes you a tad suicidal.
Well, I eat my Soreen, sliced and buttered. A bit like eating a fruit cake, excpet it's malty and a lot less in the calorie department unless you decide to be a bit heavy handed with the butter, then I guess it's a different matter. I've always bought Soreen loaf and often wondered if they 'Soreen' had any other products on the market and lone behold, I found out they do a cereal bar! A 95% fat-free cereal bar with 143 calories, can you believe it?.. one packed with raisins, rice, malt, oats and wheat. Just the kind of energy boost you need on a mid-morning break. Now I sure am excited, though I 'm pretty sure my supermarket is not shelving the product, so my quest is to locate a supermarket that does and then maybe, convince my local supermarket to add a new product to their cereal bar line...well 'if you don't ask you don't get', that what mother always taught me!
To a healthy and happy break of Soreen..! :)
Aisha
Friday, 11 December 2009
Looking forward to the weekend..
This morning was a cold and freezing start, bit of a shock to the system. As I let myself out of the house and let the door lock behind me, I realised how blooming cold it was and the car windows had freezing ice over them. It was too late to go back inside and get some warm water. I was already running late having set my alarm completely wrong, I really couldn't deal with shifting ice off my screen. I frantically sprayed de-icer and set off with visibility as poor as a blind bat! This is why dad always checks the forecast the night before!
I drove to the petrol station, since I had no fuel at all and it beeped all the way to the there. Speaking of which the flipping fuel prices have gone up yet again, I can't believe that fuel is close to £1.06p per litre. We must be one of the very few countries to be extortionately charged for our fuel but hey I needed to get to work so sod the prices!
Anyway, I had to dash home at lunchtime. I finished my paper late last night and shoved it into the envelope. I had shut the computer down and I couldn't be bothered to log back on to get my tutor details and decided I would do it at work this morning. Only when I tried that, for data protection issues the university after God knows how long has suddenly decided that the addresses are no longer on the student home page. Damn it!
I arrived home to lovely culinary smells coming from the kitchen, where mother was stood at the stove stirring away at something bubbling in the pot that looked scrummy. I daren't even walk into the kitchen, aware that I had to go back to work, and the last thing I wanted was to walk back into the office smelling like, in my brother's word 'a curry-smelling-paki'. When I first heard this remark, I thought he was being utterly derogatory. But now I kind of smirk every time I think of this statement.
My niece came running to me with an excited little face wondering what on earth I was doing home at this time of a day. We sat on the floor as I got my books and papers out, and she watched me as I quickly sketched the gate-control theory diagram. The book shut and she opened it up looking for the picture that I was sketching 'Is this the one?' she asked. Without looking up I went 'yes sweetie, that's it!' Later when I looked up I realised she'd done a pretty good job trying to find almost the exact picture of what I had sketched, though not quite the same one, her perception was outstanding.
She proceeded to tell me Khadija didn’t talk to her in nursery today and looked rather despondent. I looked at her and thought how some children don't really realise how they can hurt each other, whereas other children would go out of the way to make sure they don't hurt each other. My niece was definitely in the latter group.
I studied her little face and she looked ever so cute in her little summer dress which she said she put on because it was quite sunny this morning, even though her mother insisted to not but then in her words 'when I got outside it was really cold' Bless her, they are so innocent are kids, if only they could remain in such a state forever.
Trying to reassure her I said, well ‘maybe Khadija was having a bad day or maybe Khadija really liked your dress because sweetie you do have the ‘bestest’ dress in the world on today haven't you?' She nodded, she loves being complimented, but then who doesn't?!
She packed my things back into my folder sensing already that I was in a hurry, as I put my coat on kissed her and said goodbye to mum before I hurried back out.
Since I don't have children of my own, what you don't have, you miss the most but I completely adore my two nieces. Children bring you alive, they make you forget all the little and big worries. They make you feel wanted and special, especially when others don't and most of all; children genuinely, so innocently and undividedly need you and generally expect little or nothing in return.
I have had a really hectic week and almost every hour God has sent, I have been working flat out with very little time for recuperation. There is another huge project on the horizon which I am facing alone but I have faith in God to succeed.
Despite it all, I'm certainly looking forward to the weekend and to some 'me' time :)
Aisha
I drove to the petrol station, since I had no fuel at all and it beeped all the way to the there. Speaking of which the flipping fuel prices have gone up yet again, I can't believe that fuel is close to £1.06p per litre. We must be one of the very few countries to be extortionately charged for our fuel but hey I needed to get to work so sod the prices!
Anyway, I had to dash home at lunchtime. I finished my paper late last night and shoved it into the envelope. I had shut the computer down and I couldn't be bothered to log back on to get my tutor details and decided I would do it at work this morning. Only when I tried that, for data protection issues the university after God knows how long has suddenly decided that the addresses are no longer on the student home page. Damn it!
I arrived home to lovely culinary smells coming from the kitchen, where mother was stood at the stove stirring away at something bubbling in the pot that looked scrummy. I daren't even walk into the kitchen, aware that I had to go back to work, and the last thing I wanted was to walk back into the office smelling like, in my brother's word 'a curry-smelling-paki'. When I first heard this remark, I thought he was being utterly derogatory. But now I kind of smirk every time I think of this statement.
My niece came running to me with an excited little face wondering what on earth I was doing home at this time of a day. We sat on the floor as I got my books and papers out, and she watched me as I quickly sketched the gate-control theory diagram. The book shut and she opened it up looking for the picture that I was sketching 'Is this the one?' she asked. Without looking up I went 'yes sweetie, that's it!' Later when I looked up I realised she'd done a pretty good job trying to find almost the exact picture of what I had sketched, though not quite the same one, her perception was outstanding.
She proceeded to tell me Khadija didn’t talk to her in nursery today and looked rather despondent. I looked at her and thought how some children don't really realise how they can hurt each other, whereas other children would go out of the way to make sure they don't hurt each other. My niece was definitely in the latter group.
I studied her little face and she looked ever so cute in her little summer dress which she said she put on because it was quite sunny this morning, even though her mother insisted to not but then in her words 'when I got outside it was really cold' Bless her, they are so innocent are kids, if only they could remain in such a state forever.
Trying to reassure her I said, well ‘maybe Khadija was having a bad day or maybe Khadija really liked your dress because sweetie you do have the ‘bestest’ dress in the world on today haven't you?' She nodded, she loves being complimented, but then who doesn't?!
She packed my things back into my folder sensing already that I was in a hurry, as I put my coat on kissed her and said goodbye to mum before I hurried back out.
Since I don't have children of my own, what you don't have, you miss the most but I completely adore my two nieces. Children bring you alive, they make you forget all the little and big worries. They make you feel wanted and special, especially when others don't and most of all; children genuinely, so innocently and undividedly need you and generally expect little or nothing in return.
I have had a really hectic week and almost every hour God has sent, I have been working flat out with very little time for recuperation. There is another huge project on the horizon which I am facing alone but I have faith in God to succeed.
Despite it all, I'm certainly looking forward to the weekend and to some 'me' time :)
Aisha
Wash it away...
thank you to Naeema for this :)
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported: Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "When a Muslim or a believer washes his face (in the course of Wudu'), every sin he has committed with his eyes is washed away from his face along with water, or with the last drop of water; when he washes his hands, every sin they wrought is erased from his hands with the water, or with the last drop of water; and when he washes his feet, every sin towards which his feet walked is washed away with water, or with the last drop of water, with the result that he comes out cleansed of all sins". [Muslim]. The Prophet (PBUH) said "Pass on knowledge from me even if it is only one verse "
On this Jumuah, My Dua' is that May you be Blessed with Health, Contentment, Barakat, Noor, Steadfast Imaan, Courage, Patience, Wisdom, Understanding, Kindness Protection and Prosperity
Jummah Mubarak :)
Aisha
Wednesday, 9 December 2009
Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy
I am doing this paper for University on Pain Management and have spent the last few days collating my research, perusing books and journals just to piece the paper together. I am that tired from late nights, in fact I am utterly exhausted. I cannnot wait, for when I can have an early night and not have to wake up at the crack of dawn (though crack of dawn in the winter here is like 8am so in essence I am getting up when the world is still resting)!
Anyway, back to my pain management paper. When I first started with this work, I thought the entire subject was so complex I wouldn't be able to grasp it. Just trying to think about all the different factors in pain management as one big process, made it as clear as mud. But as with anything in science, you've got to break it down. So with a breakdown of all the chemical processes and the gate-way theories and what not, I started to understand pain management a little better. So much so that when I got to the section on Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT), I was truly fascinated. When I had to support a friend through cancer sometime back, I could have done with understanding CBT.
I was quick to discuss my findings with her. CBT uses the idea that cognition and behaviour affect pain experience, emphasising that patients can control pain. The notion is that CBT attempts to help patients cope with pain using various strategies. Patients can be trained to use distraction techniques such as thinking of pleasant images, challenging negative thoughts and replacing them with positive ideas. They are also encouraged to reattribute pain, use relaxation techniques and adopt stress management. These techniques apparently help respond better to pain experience.
So talking to her, to put such a technique into practice, we eventually agreed that it would be possible. Distracting away from the pain, does take your mind of it. But that distraction has to come completely from the mind. It's not a case of saying, I'll play scrabble and forget I have back pain, when your mind is still buzzing with the words I'm in pain!
As complex as the body systems are it is a case of working and forcing the 'mind over matter' :)
Aisha
Anyway, back to my pain management paper. When I first started with this work, I thought the entire subject was so complex I wouldn't be able to grasp it. Just trying to think about all the different factors in pain management as one big process, made it as clear as mud. But as with anything in science, you've got to break it down. So with a breakdown of all the chemical processes and the gate-way theories and what not, I started to understand pain management a little better. So much so that when I got to the section on Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT), I was truly fascinated. When I had to support a friend through cancer sometime back, I could have done with understanding CBT.
I was quick to discuss my findings with her. CBT uses the idea that cognition and behaviour affect pain experience, emphasising that patients can control pain. The notion is that CBT attempts to help patients cope with pain using various strategies. Patients can be trained to use distraction techniques such as thinking of pleasant images, challenging negative thoughts and replacing them with positive ideas. They are also encouraged to reattribute pain, use relaxation techniques and adopt stress management. These techniques apparently help respond better to pain experience.
So talking to her, to put such a technique into practice, we eventually agreed that it would be possible. Distracting away from the pain, does take your mind of it. But that distraction has to come completely from the mind. It's not a case of saying, I'll play scrabble and forget I have back pain, when your mind is still buzzing with the words I'm in pain!
As complex as the body systems are it is a case of working and forcing the 'mind over matter' :)
Aisha
Tuesday, 8 December 2009
Sunset in Agadir
The view from the newly structured promenade.
This place is like my second home! Well, actually it is, since i'm in Agadir every few months!
I love the Moroccan culture, the food is divine, the weather is pleasant all year round and the people are just great :)
Aisha
Sky-Bridge..worth the toil!
One of the things we completely intended to do during our trip to KL was to go up the towers and walk on the sky-bridge suspended between the two towers. My brother had said we should get in early! There was me thinking if I’m getting out bed at the crack of dawn, it had better be worth it!
We decided to make this trip on the last Friday before we left KL to go back home. Despite things getting rather hectic as the trip was almost coming to an end we stuck to the intended plan. Mum and dad didn't want to come but I was told I could get extra tickets so I had a small cunning plan. Having woken up at the crack of dawn, my head ached from the previous night! It's was a struggle getting the other two out of bed and finally left the hotel lobby at around 7.30, convinced we were behind schedule.
We got the mono-rail from Chow Kit and proceeded to head towards KL Sentral armed with my guide just in case. Once we got to Bukit Nanas stop, it suddenly occurred to me we were completely off track. In a panic we carried on to the next station and got off at Hang Tuah. We'd been near this station before I think or so I thought. Later I realised this was where China Town was. Had I known it then, we wouldn't have got off this station.
The place was like miles out of route for where we needed to be, and time was moving way too fast; the best approach was to hail a taxi. The other two looked at me with perplexed faces! I'm like OK, I know I’m your guide but I am trying my best here.
Hailing a taxi driver, who would use a meter in Hang Tuah, is like drawing blood from a stone and the bloody Chinese in KL are so arrogant and intimidating. I swear, nothing usually intimidates me but these drivers were awful. One guy got all funny and I could feel myself losing my temper, as I walked away spluttering every obscenity I could think of! He retorted back, which made me even angrier. In hindsight now I look back at the moment and think I was brave confronting this guy and cussing him, since he looked rather menacing!
We carried on a little further along the main road, trying my luck with some other drivers and eventually this guy stopped or so I thought it was a guy until I got up to the car and realised it was a woman! At first she was so blooming awkward, I could have clocked her one but eventually she backed down on the taxi fare and we agreed she would get us quickly outside the Tower entrance.
She turned out to be a somewhat decent driver. We chatted away about our trip and I still managed to go on about how unhappy I was about drivers not using meters, especially the Chinese, but credit to her she hurried us through shortcuts avoiding the morning traffic and got us right outside the entrance bang on before 8.30am.
We queued up a good hour, though it seemed like ages we finally got our tickets, I got a couple extra and we decided to go for the 9.30 view and I'd come back later that afternoon with mum and dad. Going up the lift was exhilarating and as we stepped out of the lift and walked onto the bridge, the view was magnificent. We could see far beyond and pointing out various landmarks that we had visited throughout our stay in KL. I’m not posting pictures unless I find one suitable, since most of them on looking back do not do any justice to what the view was like up there in veracity. I don't care what anyone says but seeing stuff from the top is awesome! When I took mum and dad back later that afternoon, the look on their faces was undeniably out of this world, they were both so awestruck with the whole experience including the exhibition and the presentation before the visit and I was so glad I had convinced them to experience it!
The Petronas Towers are superb work of architect and up until some years back, were the tallest towers in the World. But the distinction on it being the tallest building is beyond the real essence of the towers which as a tourist I could see and be part of. The towers have been maintained as an excellent link with the past and the future for the culture, heritage, technology and knowledge framework for the people of Malaysia :)
Aisha
We decided to make this trip on the last Friday before we left KL to go back home. Despite things getting rather hectic as the trip was almost coming to an end we stuck to the intended plan. Mum and dad didn't want to come but I was told I could get extra tickets so I had a small cunning plan. Having woken up at the crack of dawn, my head ached from the previous night! It's was a struggle getting the other two out of bed and finally left the hotel lobby at around 7.30, convinced we were behind schedule.
We got the mono-rail from Chow Kit and proceeded to head towards KL Sentral armed with my guide just in case. Once we got to Bukit Nanas stop, it suddenly occurred to me we were completely off track. In a panic we carried on to the next station and got off at Hang Tuah. We'd been near this station before I think or so I thought. Later I realised this was where China Town was. Had I known it then, we wouldn't have got off this station.
The place was like miles out of route for where we needed to be, and time was moving way too fast; the best approach was to hail a taxi. The other two looked at me with perplexed faces! I'm like OK, I know I’m your guide but I am trying my best here.
Hailing a taxi driver, who would use a meter in Hang Tuah, is like drawing blood from a stone and the bloody Chinese in KL are so arrogant and intimidating. I swear, nothing usually intimidates me but these drivers were awful. One guy got all funny and I could feel myself losing my temper, as I walked away spluttering every obscenity I could think of! He retorted back, which made me even angrier. In hindsight now I look back at the moment and think I was brave confronting this guy and cussing him, since he looked rather menacing!
We carried on a little further along the main road, trying my luck with some other drivers and eventually this guy stopped or so I thought it was a guy until I got up to the car and realised it was a woman! At first she was so blooming awkward, I could have clocked her one but eventually she backed down on the taxi fare and we agreed she would get us quickly outside the Tower entrance.
She turned out to be a somewhat decent driver. We chatted away about our trip and I still managed to go on about how unhappy I was about drivers not using meters, especially the Chinese, but credit to her she hurried us through shortcuts avoiding the morning traffic and got us right outside the entrance bang on before 8.30am.
We queued up a good hour, though it seemed like ages we finally got our tickets, I got a couple extra and we decided to go for the 9.30 view and I'd come back later that afternoon with mum and dad. Going up the lift was exhilarating and as we stepped out of the lift and walked onto the bridge, the view was magnificent. We could see far beyond and pointing out various landmarks that we had visited throughout our stay in KL. I’m not posting pictures unless I find one suitable, since most of them on looking back do not do any justice to what the view was like up there in veracity. I don't care what anyone says but seeing stuff from the top is awesome! When I took mum and dad back later that afternoon, the look on their faces was undeniably out of this world, they were both so awestruck with the whole experience including the exhibition and the presentation before the visit and I was so glad I had convinced them to experience it!
The Petronas Towers are superb work of architect and up until some years back, were the tallest towers in the World. But the distinction on it being the tallest building is beyond the real essence of the towers which as a tourist I could see and be part of. The towers have been maintained as an excellent link with the past and the future for the culture, heritage, technology and knowledge framework for the people of Malaysia :)
Aisha
Petronas Twin Towers KL
I haven't elaborated on my Far East trip I know and I said I would in good time, but I was going through some pictures and came across this one. I remember taking it as we sat in the gardens surrounding the Suria KLCC Shopping Plaza. The shopping mall sits directly underneath and in between the Petronas Towers, hence the good angle of the picture.
The park and its landscape at the heart of the KLCC quarter have a magnificent and unique concept with some outstanding water features. It's the perfect sanctuary and Lake Symphony, located at the esplande outside Suria has the most attractive and enchanting water fountains. We had seen the towers by day on several occasions but on this evening, the sun was just setting, it was surprisingly tranquil, the whole place was beautifully lit, and against the back drop of the evening blue sky, the scene was tremendously remarkable.
We were all feeling rather melancholy that evening. We met up earlier that afternoon with my brother and sister-in-law, who had flown in from Perth, especially to see us. We had spent the afternoon meandering through all the exquisite shops in the Suria Plaza, and stopping to chat over cups of coffee! When your brother is so far away, you value deeply the short time you have. So having said our goodbyes that evening before they left back for Perth, this picture definitely reflected the mood and emotions at that moment, though I didn't realise how much up until now...truly amazing!
Aisha
--
Sent from my mobile device
Monday, 7 December 2009
Sacrifices...
I started writing various bits of this piece some time back and never really got round to post it. Each time I came back to it, I thought of little bits to add to it and before long, the whole piece was a jumble of thoughts and ideas. Then last week with Eid, the subject of sacrifice came up yet again and I thought of this writing again. Anyway I've had to almost re-write this to make some sense of it but in essence the original bits are still there in all the right places. Some bits I discarded since I couldn’t even remember why I had made notes on. But don't you just love it when things seem totally incoherent and you have a bit of a shake-up and voila it all fits in. I had that with my bedroom a few weeks ago, everything was just all over the place and I got sick of trying to sort stuff out. I was moving one thing from one place and putting in on to another. In the end I just thought, pull it apart and start all over again!
Anyway back to this topic of sacrifice. What does it mean, to sacrifice? ....Does it mean one thing for one person and something completely different to another person? Commonly sacrifice is associated in the giving of something, food and object or such. This takes me to the one important topic on sacrifice and associated directly with Eid that has just passed.
In our house we have offered the sacrifice at Eid Al Adha for as long as I can remember. My parents have always been good to show us Eid Al Adha in its true spirit. Aside from the beauty and spiritual benefits attained from it as adults, it is also a learning phase for our children, for they need to understand Islam and the best way to this is to practice the religion. There needs to be signs. Its little point in saying well you do this, this and that if you are Muslim. They need actions and they do say that actions speak louder than words. That's right folks actions speak louder than words. Thankfully my nieces are absolutely full of questions, they are the most inquisitive of children, that's what I love about children, they are just truly amazing, you can sit with them for hours and have a mountain of patience talking to them, knowing that every answer will be followed by yet another question and never getting fed-up. Children are my favorite of people!
Anyway the sacrifice of Eid, Qurbani to some, to others Udhiya, is an act performed for the sake of Allah and a truly amazing form of worship. What better way to attain the reward from Allah and have the pleasure of eating from a sacrificed animal? Salah is the greatest form of worship but for the worship concerning wealth, sacrificial act on Eid Al Adha holds great reverence as the original will for the sacrifice was for a soul, the soul of Ismail peace be upon him, at the commandment of God to Ibrahim peace be upon him. Imagine having to sacrifice your son, your beloved son. Ibrahim was ready to do this without a glimmer of doubt. Can we ever reach to the level of faith and fortitude as of Ibrahim? Allah tested Ibrahim's faith and he, Ibrahim never waivered, willing to carry out the sacrifice of his son, but once his submission had been tested, the body of Ismail was replaced with an animal which Ibrahim sacrificed. Even Ismail was happy for his father to carry out this commandment from Allah; he too was firm and resolute. From then onwards all able Muslims were to perform this act. The sacrifice is an act of total submission to God, that you obedient to Allah and his commands, and that we are slaves of Allah, should we not then surrender to Him? Ibrahim never questioned why he must sacrifice his son. That is a true philosophy of sacrifice, to give without question.
This takes me to my more general idea on sacrifice in our worldly lives. How many of us have made sacrifices, little sacrifices to even bigger ones. How many of us make true sacrifices, give up for the sake of others? Many of the times I find something hurts deeply to give up, but you still do for the sake of others around you. These are worldly matters and they bear resemblance on you character depending on how you handle things. We sacrifice, time, wealth and even love.
There are times when we want to achieve something, the most difficult of decisions need to be made, and usually at those times we have to make sacrifices. Sadly many people don't make sacrifices. They want everything, no matter what or who get's hurt in the process. But life is about others, not just about one or two people you chose.
Did you sacrifice for another or did you give up in a self-seeking way? Whatever the answer to this question, just remember someone, somewhere may have gotten hurt in the process and that is something no one should have to live with.
If you make a sacrifice, make it genuinely and most of all don't tread over things or people that you pass in getting where you need to get to :)
Aisha
Anyway back to this topic of sacrifice. What does it mean, to sacrifice? ....Does it mean one thing for one person and something completely different to another person? Commonly sacrifice is associated in the giving of something, food and object or such. This takes me to the one important topic on sacrifice and associated directly with Eid that has just passed.
In our house we have offered the sacrifice at Eid Al Adha for as long as I can remember. My parents have always been good to show us Eid Al Adha in its true spirit. Aside from the beauty and spiritual benefits attained from it as adults, it is also a learning phase for our children, for they need to understand Islam and the best way to this is to practice the religion. There needs to be signs. Its little point in saying well you do this, this and that if you are Muslim. They need actions and they do say that actions speak louder than words. That's right folks actions speak louder than words. Thankfully my nieces are absolutely full of questions, they are the most inquisitive of children, that's what I love about children, they are just truly amazing, you can sit with them for hours and have a mountain of patience talking to them, knowing that every answer will be followed by yet another question and never getting fed-up. Children are my favorite of people!
Anyway the sacrifice of Eid, Qurbani to some, to others Udhiya, is an act performed for the sake of Allah and a truly amazing form of worship. What better way to attain the reward from Allah and have the pleasure of eating from a sacrificed animal? Salah is the greatest form of worship but for the worship concerning wealth, sacrificial act on Eid Al Adha holds great reverence as the original will for the sacrifice was for a soul, the soul of Ismail peace be upon him, at the commandment of God to Ibrahim peace be upon him. Imagine having to sacrifice your son, your beloved son. Ibrahim was ready to do this without a glimmer of doubt. Can we ever reach to the level of faith and fortitude as of Ibrahim? Allah tested Ibrahim's faith and he, Ibrahim never waivered, willing to carry out the sacrifice of his son, but once his submission had been tested, the body of Ismail was replaced with an animal which Ibrahim sacrificed. Even Ismail was happy for his father to carry out this commandment from Allah; he too was firm and resolute. From then onwards all able Muslims were to perform this act. The sacrifice is an act of total submission to God, that you obedient to Allah and his commands, and that we are slaves of Allah, should we not then surrender to Him? Ibrahim never questioned why he must sacrifice his son. That is a true philosophy of sacrifice, to give without question.
This takes me to my more general idea on sacrifice in our worldly lives. How many of us have made sacrifices, little sacrifices to even bigger ones. How many of us make true sacrifices, give up for the sake of others? Many of the times I find something hurts deeply to give up, but you still do for the sake of others around you. These are worldly matters and they bear resemblance on you character depending on how you handle things. We sacrifice, time, wealth and even love.
There are times when we want to achieve something, the most difficult of decisions need to be made, and usually at those times we have to make sacrifices. Sadly many people don't make sacrifices. They want everything, no matter what or who get's hurt in the process. But life is about others, not just about one or two people you chose.
Did you sacrifice for another or did you give up in a self-seeking way? Whatever the answer to this question, just remember someone, somewhere may have gotten hurt in the process and that is something no one should have to live with.
If you make a sacrifice, make it genuinely and most of all don't tread over things or people that you pass in getting where you need to get to :)
Aisha
What about Now...
I have this track on loop, since I just totally love listening to it. It's actually an original by Chris Daughtry, I don't recall listetning to it much then, though I do remember the video sent a powerful message. Anyway it's the Westlife version that I am kind of addicted to, not that I'm a Westlife fan but all the same, this song is beautiful, Daughtry or Westlife, love it!
Shadows fill an empty heart
As love is fading,
From all the things that we are
But are not saying.
Can we see beyond the scars
And make it to the dawn?
Change the colors of the sky.
And open up to
The ways you made me feel alive,
The ways I loved you.
For all the things that never died,
To make it through the night,
Love will find you.
What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?
The sun is breaking in your eyes
To start a new day.
This broken heart can still survive
With a touch of your grace.
Shadows fade into the light.
I am by your side,
Where love will find you.
What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love had never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?
Now that we're here,
Now that we've come this far,
Just hold on.
There is nothing to fear,
For I am right beside you.
For all my life,
I am yours.
What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love had never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
What about now?
What about today?
What if you're making me all that I was meant to be?
What if our love had never went away?
What if it's lost behind words we could never find?
Baby, before it's too late,
Baby, before it's too late,
Baby, before it's too late,
What about now?
Eid..Hajj..Arafah..
Having not reflected on the blog for almost six weeks, there is a mountain of thoughts and emotions churning away in my head. Speaking of churning, some dippy oldish lady I work with thought churning wasn't a word. I was like Churn as in butter; she thought I'd made it up. Really she's great, just a bit dippy. But yes when I say churn, I think of butter, especially since I am sure supermarkets shelve the Churn brand of butter, still she wasn't convinced!
So yes, I was saying I have all these unfinished pieces of writing that I keep meaning to update and post up on here and just haven't gotten round to it, so beware people you may see an influx of posting up here sometime soon.
Ok, onto Eid. The Day of Arafah is always the most tranquil of moments, I don't have to be there, out in the plains of Arafat to feel and experience this. Once you have been there, the electric feeling remains with you forever. You can be as far away detached from Hajj, but the minute someone mentions Yaum Al Arafah it all comes flooding back and if I see even a glimpse of the scene on television, the emotions evoked are even more compelling. You have to have had experience Hajj to feel this. I am sure of it. Never in my life has such an event impacted me as did Hajj. It was the most beautiful and memorable experience ever gifted to me and will remain the best gift I ever have throughout my existence.
So yes, I was talking about Arafah in particular here. There was a huge buzz of activity when we arrived to the tents that day all those years ago, and while some were wondering around like lost souls, some determined to explore the place and some ascended to the Mount. Each unto their own intention. I was determined to get settled in to a tent, shabby as it may have looked especially for some in our camp, it was enough for me just to be in the shade, I still wanted to see out in to the plains of Arafah and the sky beyond the Mount but I knew I needed to be in the shade if I was to survive through this day. I have never felt so special and connected to Allah than I did on this day. This was the very day that Allah had perfected His religion for His slaves, without a doubt I felt special. I am sure I wasn't the only one, but nevertheless what I felt was so significant, a set of emotions, a magnificent experience I could take with me wherever I proceeded with my life from that point onwards.
Just an hour or so before sunset, I remember leaving the tent, and being out in the complete open, the entire ground as far beyond as I could see was dotted with all these bodies clothed in white, such a pure vision, such a united vision, nothing could ever compare to this vision. As the sunset, I just didn't want to let this day go, if only I could remain in it forever but I realised that this day, where I felt most safe, most pure was about to end and I had to go back out in the to this big and sadly not so nice world and its people within it, and prayed so hard that I would face it with complete determination of success and with absolute faith and strength; no matter what life was to throw at me from this point onwards, I would take in my stride, deal with it to the best of my ability and If I was to err, it would never be knowingly and I would seek Allah's mercy and forgiveness forever onwards. I know all this sound kind of soppy but really, how can a true servant of God not feel this way after they have experienced Hajj, after experiencing Yaum Al Arafah.
One other thought that remained with me through this day is the day of Yaum Al Hashr, the day of reckoning when we would all gather on this very ground, yes we are all to return on this very soil to be reckoned for our action and nothing could escape this. The complete reality of Judgement does not hit a person until you actually step foot on that soil. On that very soil will be the final gathering of the people for reckoning. It's enough alone to shake and put into check a person's life!
That day for me ended though emotional, most beautifully, nothing would ever compare to it. Every Eid Al Adha it stirs up many memories more profoundly than any other time throughout the year. It allows for a striking significance to Eid along with some other relevant points pertaining to this festival.
We had a fantastic feast at our house and the sacrifice signified Eid perfectly. Mum got her huge pots out and made the most delicious food. The roast we had on Saturday was divine. I devoured over the food throughout the few days. I'd made some quick sweetmeats earlier in the week and they finished the meals off nicely. Alhamdulillah. Happy times they were indeed, for it is with happiness in our hearts that we must seek pleasure and ultimately attain reward.
I sincerely hope my friends that you had a joyous occasion with your loved ones and importantly ate your feasts to your desires :)
Aisha
So yes, I was saying I have all these unfinished pieces of writing that I keep meaning to update and post up on here and just haven't gotten round to it, so beware people you may see an influx of posting up here sometime soon.
Ok, onto Eid. The Day of Arafah is always the most tranquil of moments, I don't have to be there, out in the plains of Arafat to feel and experience this. Once you have been there, the electric feeling remains with you forever. You can be as far away detached from Hajj, but the minute someone mentions Yaum Al Arafah it all comes flooding back and if I see even a glimpse of the scene on television, the emotions evoked are even more compelling. You have to have had experience Hajj to feel this. I am sure of it. Never in my life has such an event impacted me as did Hajj. It was the most beautiful and memorable experience ever gifted to me and will remain the best gift I ever have throughout my existence.
So yes, I was talking about Arafah in particular here. There was a huge buzz of activity when we arrived to the tents that day all those years ago, and while some were wondering around like lost souls, some determined to explore the place and some ascended to the Mount. Each unto their own intention. I was determined to get settled in to a tent, shabby as it may have looked especially for some in our camp, it was enough for me just to be in the shade, I still wanted to see out in to the plains of Arafah and the sky beyond the Mount but I knew I needed to be in the shade if I was to survive through this day. I have never felt so special and connected to Allah than I did on this day. This was the very day that Allah had perfected His religion for His slaves, without a doubt I felt special. I am sure I wasn't the only one, but nevertheless what I felt was so significant, a set of emotions, a magnificent experience I could take with me wherever I proceeded with my life from that point onwards.
Just an hour or so before sunset, I remember leaving the tent, and being out in the complete open, the entire ground as far beyond as I could see was dotted with all these bodies clothed in white, such a pure vision, such a united vision, nothing could ever compare to this vision. As the sunset, I just didn't want to let this day go, if only I could remain in it forever but I realised that this day, where I felt most safe, most pure was about to end and I had to go back out in the to this big and sadly not so nice world and its people within it, and prayed so hard that I would face it with complete determination of success and with absolute faith and strength; no matter what life was to throw at me from this point onwards, I would take in my stride, deal with it to the best of my ability and If I was to err, it would never be knowingly and I would seek Allah's mercy and forgiveness forever onwards. I know all this sound kind of soppy but really, how can a true servant of God not feel this way after they have experienced Hajj, after experiencing Yaum Al Arafah.
One other thought that remained with me through this day is the day of Yaum Al Hashr, the day of reckoning when we would all gather on this very ground, yes we are all to return on this very soil to be reckoned for our action and nothing could escape this. The complete reality of Judgement does not hit a person until you actually step foot on that soil. On that very soil will be the final gathering of the people for reckoning. It's enough alone to shake and put into check a person's life!
That day for me ended though emotional, most beautifully, nothing would ever compare to it. Every Eid Al Adha it stirs up many memories more profoundly than any other time throughout the year. It allows for a striking significance to Eid along with some other relevant points pertaining to this festival.
We had a fantastic feast at our house and the sacrifice signified Eid perfectly. Mum got her huge pots out and made the most delicious food. The roast we had on Saturday was divine. I devoured over the food throughout the few days. I'd made some quick sweetmeats earlier in the week and they finished the meals off nicely. Alhamdulillah. Happy times they were indeed, for it is with happiness in our hearts that we must seek pleasure and ultimately attain reward.
I sincerely hope my friends that you had a joyous occasion with your loved ones and importantly ate your feasts to your desires :)
Aisha
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